newness

Everyone has been blogging these days...apparantly, I've decided to as well. Let me just start by saying, I may not have anything "life changing" to share or have any "deep provoking" thoughts. On top of that, I am mostly terrible at grammar. Almost every sentence will be grammatically incorrect...I do not care though. I type how I talk. yay! 

Anyways, I have decided to blog because my dear friend Courtney Clark said to me, "you should start blogging to share all your thoughts and experiences." I thought to myself - what a great idea?? I have been loving reading other peoples blogs and birth stories. Also,  I have so many new thoughts and feelings happening in my life. I got engaged, married, and pregnant all in under one year. This march it will be one year since I have been engaged, sept marks 1 year of marriage, and the baby will be born in August or September right before our anniversary. WOW! what a year full of blessings and all my hearts desires.  

Getting Pregnant:

Im sure all of you know how this happens :) .....some of you may say/think  - wow she got pregnant right away! was it on purpose? (I've heard this question a lot) The answer is kinda :) LOONNGGG story short - When I was 16 I was told I had "endometriosis" and was put on birth control, I was on it for 5 years. One morning I woke up and thought - I have to get off birth control. Weird huh? Well, to me it was the Lord. When I got off of it within 2 months and 2 nightmare cycles I knew something felt wrong. I got my hormones tested and I was pre-menopausal.....what a nightmare...I had been told before and was told again that I would have a hard time getting pregnant or would not be able to. This was all completely devastating to me, my whole life I could not wait to be a mom. Anyways, I was put on natural hormone therapy for a little over a year (bio identical hormone replacement) 6 weeks before our wedding I took a chance, got off of them, and tested my hormones. 1 week before the wedding I got the results back that I was back on track without the hormones (PTL!) my body finally kicked in began producing things on its own! However, during those 6 weeks before the wedding I developed a hemorrhagic cyst on my right ovary and a bunch of regular cysts on my left ovary.....needless to say, I became very discouraged. my hemorrhagic cyst burst and I wasnt able to do anything. It was the most painful thing I had ever experienced. All the fluid was in my abdominal cavity and had to absorb into my body...OUCH! One nurse said to me that hers was "as bad as giving birth" hmmm...we shall see. Anyway, through all of this the Lord was so close to me, he heard all my prayers and gathered my tears in a jar (cheesy but true). I knew he would heal me and I knew he knew my heart, I wanted to be a mom.
When Josh and I got together one of the many things we had in common was our excitement and desire about being parents. He knew my whole situation from day one and he prayed over my hormones and my womb almost every single night. He blessed my body and prayed life over my endocrine system. All of this brought hope to my every single day. SO - when we got married we weren't really all about preventing something that could be a miracle and blessing to have happen to us. The first month we used protection and then after than we just didnt worry about it. When I got my period in october and november I was ok with it but deep down inside I was worried thinking - why am I not pregnant?! - Finally, December came and brought a big surprise! We found out we were pregnant!! This blog entry is getting long so Ill tell that story another time :)
Not sure why I went into all that? It just felt right :) I dont mind being candid. Basically, Josh is the man of my dreams and the love of my heart, starting a family with him  is the #1 thing I want to do with my life.  I hope you enjoy my blog and my stories....ignore my grammar....or lack thereof.